I’m Becoming Less Social

Is it just me or has anyone else felt less extroverted since we first started shelter-in-place? If you know me, I’m very extroverted and I thrive around groups of people. Well at least that was me prior to quarantine. Now, I do not think I could say I’m the same.

I think it’s the fact that I’ve gotten so much time to spend with just myself that I think I realized that I don’t need to be surrounded by others to feel happy or excited. I used to have serious FOMO and valued time spent with others over time spent alone. However, with all this time I had to myself I learned so much about myself. By myself, I had more time to learn languages, play instruments, read books, and hone on new skills. I could go an entire week with no contact to the outside world and feel more free than before. I’m not too sure if this is a good thing, but I know that this has improved my self-worth. I feel like I’m becoming friends with myself and I want to spend more and more time getting to know me.

However, this definitely has negative effects as well. I definitely have lost social skills. I have a harder time interpreting emotions and social cues. Communicating over Zoom or any other video calling apps have proved to be difficult for me. On top of that, on the occasion I participate in social-distanced hangouts with my friends, I find myself getting exhausted from being with people and holding a conversation. Conversing with others has become difficult for me. Someone who once could talk herself out of any situation. I miss that part of me. Not only is it sad but it scares me. I got to college next year and how will I be able to make friends, form a whole new group, and adjust when I am slowly losing my social skills?

Nevertheless, I know that we will all persist. It’s a matter of adaptation and adaptation takes time. If you’re going through the same experience, I hope you know you’re not alone. Please reach out. Have a good week guys. <3